If there’s one thing I strive to not become, it’s being a martyr of my parent’s ideals. There is an everlasting gift that one’s parental figure gives, whether or not they are present at all in your life. The gift is an interpersonal ghost that lingers on people and is theirs until they are dead: which then goes on to haunt whomever is in the next generation.

These are the generation curses that bind all of us, and will stop us from being who we really want to be. Generational curses can range from depression, alcohol/drug addiction, narrow minded thinking, and self destructive habits. A Lot of these curses appear to be very dismissable; seeing these corruptible tendencies in these people are often thought as their problem, or something that you yourself are immune to.

There is a difference between a parent and a friend; one cannot be both. A friend walks alongside you and is on the same emotional level. What a parent must do is push away whatever self destructive habits they may have and try their best toward guiding their child to be better than them. Unfortunately there has been a cultural shift where the adult figures of many communities choose to live and learn with their children, rather than raising their kids up above them to achieve greater heights than they could ever reach.

The “bad example,” e.g. Do as I say not as I do, is always going to be prominent in someone’s life. Avoiding something like that can never really last. It seems like something that can be ignored, but it is something that will eventually take hold and affect your life. The only way to deal with it is to face it head on. This is much easier said than done.

These generational curses must be broken, especially to protect future generations. For you to be truly happy, the corruption must be broken. It takes time and cannot be done in a single day. It may even take years to breakthrough the shade of corruption that has been passed on, but in order to be at peace, it must be done.

When taking on these ghosts you must remember to take a moment and think: “Is this really what I want?”

If you had a child, a little boy or girl, is this how you would want them to see you and is this how you would want someone to remember you? When I die, I don’t want to be remembered as a sad alcoholic who always talked about being great, but never really was. Attempt things that your mom or dad never would have, so that at least when you die you would have been better than them because you led a life with no remorse. Because with depression, addiction, and insanity comes a life of regret and we all deserve better than that.

Just remember: you are better than your parents. The goal of a parent is to have their child be better than them, so if they aren’t willing to put in the effort, we have to.