Have you guys ever heard of the song “What is Love?” by Haddaway? I am sure you all have some time in your life. In that song the first lyrics are:
What is Love
Baby don’t hurt me
Don’t hurt me no more.
No one wants to get hurt in a relationship. I know I don’t. Do you ever get afraid of losing that one person who could possibly be the one?
In my past relationships each one was a disappointment. Luckily, I didn’t get hurt. Now I am in a relationship and I’m terrified of losing him. To me he is perfect which makes me feel terrified because I actually have something to lose.
Candance Bushnell, writer of The Carrie Diaries, wrote “love is spiritual. It’s about self-sacrifice and commitment. And discipline. You cannot have true love without discipline and respect. When you lose the respect of your spouse, you lose everything.”
Frankly, I agree with Candance. Perhaps that is the reason my past relationships haven’t worked and I end up regretting it in the end. If you don’t have respect and even discipline there is no true relationship.
There is a time in our relationships where we forget that we are different from our significant other.
John Gray, writer of Mars and Venus in Love, mentioned in his book “Women assume men will do the things women do when they love someone. Men assume women will react the way a man would react when he loves someone.”
Some of you out there are probably saying “Oh no… I don’t think that way.” Truth is, you have thought that way once. I have to admit I’ve thought that way, and after some time I accepted that he didn’t think like me.
Some of us assume that our significant other will react the same way we do in the relationship. We just have to accept we can’t always get what we want and keep moving forward. Maybe that is why we get hurt so easily, because we can’t accept it and move forward.
When you start to understand your partner, you begin to respond in a new light. As you begin to understand him/her, something magical begins to happen. We begin to see the way our partner is struggling to be loving in their own way, to keep us happy, As you begin to realize that, all of a sudden you are “falling in love.” And it begins to scare you a little bit, and for that very reason you are afraid to lose them.
Many people don’t experience being in love now a days so they lose faith in it. Never have high expectations. Someone may surprise you.
Straight, bisexual, gay, or lesbian… there will always be someone out there for you. Don’t ever be afraid if they are the complete opposite of you. You know what they say: Opposites attract.